“The January Nap: A Case for Self Love”

Through the months of visitors, year end business and the preparation for my daughter’s wedding when I thought I would expire trying to do seventeen-things-at-once I would promise myself this “I will nap the entire month of January”.  I regularly began my days at 4am just to get some quiet time before the day erupted in activity and the dance of decision, what held me together was the lure of giving myself January to recover, revive and recalibrate.

Holy Spirit provided some handy reminders in the form of a drippy head cold, low blood pressure (I had to halt my pilates session as I kept trying to pass out) and a blissfully empty post-wedding bank account.  All of this led to my finally honoring the promise I made to myself of using January to nap and recover.  I almost fell off the wagon when we had a dear friend visit from Japan but thankfully he was willing to have a “quiet” visit with conversation, a movie and a wee trip to taste champagne in Napa Valley.  We joined with him in his jet lag and were all in bed by 8:30 each evening.

More refreshment?  Yes please!

I finally slowed down long enough to notice I was resisting this January Nap and eventually paused long enough to ask Holy Spirit how can I, the one who seeks to help all learn to help myself?  I was not disappointed and the recognition and relief of how I might return to myself was compelling.

HS:  Dearest One,

Greetings and blessings to you Precious One, it is, indeed, a perfect morning to return to Our Heart and listen, trust, ask and receive.  Thank you for joining in this way.

Be still and know help is but a stepping stone to the awareness of wholeness. Help sees and desires wholeness but can only see the parts that must be assembled in order to imagine wholeness coming to fruition.  Help cannot yet see this:

Wholeness IS.

Wholeness always IS.

Wholeness always IS present.

Help is desiring wholeness yet seeing only parts.

Me:  So how can I be truly helpful (especially to my self)?

HS:  First and foremost you must see, notice, feel and be aware of your own self.  This is the most helpful to all because it will radiate out power, strength, wholeness, certainty, awareness, truth.  Here. Now. Forever.

Guidance isn’t secret, opportunity to hear & follow abound in every moment!

There truly is no “other” you are helping.  You are always helping (or not helping) your self. Helping others exclusively is a good way to continue to ignore, deny, forget, see-as-unimportant your self.  Your self is your Self.  Your self is the doorway to your Self.  By noticing, embracing, being aware of, listening to, feeling and entering into your self you automatically enter into that forever place of spacious grace that is Self, Heart, God, One.

This is where and how all are connected.

Over-helping is a dis-ease. A dis-ease with yourself.

When you allow, welcome, embrace, notice, give time to receiving your own self, you are more able to truly listen to what a brother might actually be asking for.  When helping isn’t helpful you can immediately feel a drop in energy–an element of force, effort, demand enters the room–whether it is you forcing your self to do something or you attempting to force, convince, convert, change-the-mind-of or alter another.

Hear your own heart Precious One, listen to what you are actually saying (take notes).  There is no mystery here. Guidance isn’t secret.  Opportunity to hear and follow abound in every moment.  The “mystery” is that you keep closing your eyes to your self because you think that this is “right” somehow.

Choose Wholeness, for this IS what you are.”

And so I cancelled what little was on my schedule.  Put back all of those wonderful “let’s start the year right” meetings and coaching sessions and vowed to take five naps in a row.  It is a funny world that proclaiming a time of rest and scheduling a nap counts as everything from sassy to dereliction of duty.  I can happily report that napping (& canceling & resting) is paying off.  I can breathe without passing out, I am now beginning to get excited by the prospects of this bountiful year and we have even booked a trip to Australia later in the year for a family wedding.  A month ago I would have thought this impossible.

Step one: find a willing napping partner!

After my twelvemonth of self love where I tackled my epic fears one at a time I can no longer ignore my own self for very long.  Even in the midst of my busiest time I would wake up and sit quietly and listen to my own breath and do everything I could do in the time allowed to nurture, remind and listen to my own heart.

“Hallelujah!  I am back and ready to write, write, write.”  That is when I knew I was beginning to feel restored, all I wanted to do was write.

How are you practicing self love this year?  Let’s practice together.  But first, I am going to take another nap.