I Can’t Go Anywhere Without My Self

I have just finished a teleconference call with Jack Canfield (you remember my buddy I walked with during my month of extending love to my fear of success) and branding expert Nick Nanton (who I only know through email updates) about publishing a best-selling book.  It seemed harmless enough to listen to the call.  I mean, how could I not listen to find out how I could publish a best-selling book with Jack Canfield.  It is a program, it turns out, to quietly, yet honestly, manufacture a best-selling (this best-selling moniker is the key and the guarantee) anthology of sorts called “The Road To Success”.  I would love to write the chapter that sits right in the middle, or better yet is the preface for people like me who immediately (still) feel their heart pound immeasurably louder all the while running cold when they hear talk about “success“.  The chapter would remind the reader that success is indeed within your grasp, it is your very own self.  There.  It’s over.  You know now that success is YOU, accomplished.  I see how you might think this is not actually very helpful but I am in that “after” place of all such possibility speeches (especially the ones who require me to outlay a sizable investment) of feeling “less than”, wretched even, for no accountable reason.

“What if?” or “What IS!”

I need to find out why I feel this way now, and why I tend to feel this way when presented with that tantalizing prospect of “What if?”.  I possess a vivid, very active (some might say overactive) imagination.  I can imagine my dream life, walking on water (Jesus did so why not?), lots of zeros after the 1 in my bank account and even running a marathon.  “What if?”‘s seeming purpose is to get you to see further, differently, bigger, better……in other words OUT THERE.

Yet.  Yet, here is most definitely where I am.  I have no trouble imagining OUT THERE.  What I have trouble doing is re-imagining, i.e. noticing, RIGHT HERE, right now. This is what came to me (Thanks Holy Spirit😉 while I was bemoaning another “What if?” possibility:  Instead of “What if?” notice “What is!”.  Oh.  OH!  What IS. Well, right now my heart is calmer that at the beginning of the paragraph, my tea is cold, the dog is snoring and I am feeling lighter.  “What is!” allows me to be a success right here, right now.  Anybody (especially me) can ask “What if?” which gets us all looking in a different direction, possibly with excitement and or promise of “OUT THERE…….it is so much better than right here!”  No wonder I feel left out.  I inevitably leave my own self out when I ask or imagine “What if?”

When asking myself or someone else “What is?”, I feel a momentary pause,

Rugby goes everywhere with his relationship with his Self completely in tact.

possibly even a slightly quizzical look, as if to imply “Well, isn’t it obvious?” I go on to ask “No, really, what IS?”  At first the answers are much like my own, I tend to notice my body first (I’m hungry, tired, achy), then possible the room or place I am in (there is a beautiful Persian rug, the clock is ticking, the lawn mower next door is loud).  Eventually I get to how I might be feeling (I am annoyed at this stupid question, I feel excited & hopeful or, more likely, left behind & clueless).  It is only when I am finally admitting to myself  “What IS” that I see that this is a bit of a foot planting exersize. This asking “What is?” can immediately turn from a question to a statement of “What IS!”.  Why this feels good I am not sure but I think it is that I have now given myself permission to be, feel, see, notice exactly the truth about myself thus I am now ready for any inner guidance or inspiration. When I try to leap over planting my self firmly in, well, my Self, I feel overwhelmed.  When I go from the firm ground of my Self I feel guided, beloved and inspired.  I can’t go anywhere without my Self it seems.

Where are you leaving your Self behind or out of the equation?  Notice any area you are feeling uncertain, discomfort or bloody annoyed and I guarantee you have left your self out of the picture. Now is the perfect time to ask yourself “What is?”  Once you know “What IS!”  that sure inner guidance that will lead you to “What if?” is not far behind.  It turns out you CAN take you Self everywhere.