A Mantra for One

My commitment to daily Twelvemonth postings concluded in April of this year and, not surprisingly, life has continued unabated to the point that I look back in utter wonder at my accomplishment of 365 days of daily blog postings.

Here is what I am learning about myself three months out since that mammoth commitment of extending love to my fears, my self and my experience and blogging about this daily:

1. Fears continue (as do occasional overwhelm, crossness & self-forgetting) but it is so much easier to recognize them so I can immediately decide to extend love in whatever color or form is needed (Ask Holy Spirit for a message, a cup of tea, a nap, a needed conversation or whatever else is desired in the moment.)
2. Without a daily commitment to MY SELF I find myself feeling dissipated, uncertain and lacking clarity of purpose.
3. My life continues flowing through me abundantly whether I blog or not (this includes events, meetings, visitors, thoughts, feelings, weddings, meals, weather, gifts….in other words, time & space happen).
   

   The abundance of life continues to flow through me.

4. I really miss the daily-ness of purpose I felt pulsing within me when I committed myself to extend love to my fears and notice and record the process in a blog. I am, in fact, surrounded by purpose. I am a multi-purposing machine. Multi-tasking is what is used to complete a to-do list; multi-purposing is the way I attempt to accomplish my own to-be list. I breathe purpose. I see all of what I do as part of my greater purpose: how I serve and enhance our family, businesses and community, including my fellow drought-weary Californian’s who now swap water-saving ideas and secrets at parties the way teens swap beauty tips (Tip: when you carry the bucket you leave under the shower-head to collect water as you get the temperature right and then carry it out to fill your ever-evaporating pool…..hold the bucket by the rim, NOT the handle, unless you want to spend the next 60 minutes sucking up the spill with a wet-vac.) I realized I am purpose driven. Without a clear sense of purpose, I wilt. What I learned about myself after my twelvemonth of daily extending love and blogging about my practice was that I really miss the purpose I extended to my self by committing to my own self love.

What’s next?!

I loved it so much I have been asking the Holy Spirit every day “What’s next?!!” like I could now check Self-Love off on my TO-DO list. I am realizing that Self-Love isn’t a THING, or a task or even a journal entry. Self-Love is a daily practice—my commitment to my own heart—a mantra for One.

5. I realized my Twelvemonth wasn’t a yearlong task or experience it was a blueprint for the exquisite birthing of the awareness of Love’s Purpose for My Self. I want to publish a book of my twelvemonth blog so I have been working with my editorial and marketing team (my daughter Savannah, her friend Delia, my coach Sandra and my long term spiritual sister Valerie) to create the Twelvemonth of Self-Love in book form. During this process of reading, re-reading, editing and reading again I began to feel like I was on a blind date that was going nowhere fast. Sure my date was good looking, loved antiques and reading and was fascinating but I felt no sparkle, energy or even interest. It was falling flat. Not the material itself. At the risk of blushing so my face will be the color of my summer pink lipstick I must admit I am continuously moved and amazed what was in my blog; both what the Holy Spirit said and what I asked, mused and questioned.

What was not exciting me, I am just now discovering, was not the task and journey of publishing, per se, but the persistent thought of:  “Is this all there is?!!”. I realized that it isn’t just the conversations with Holy Spirit which is critical to my heart or the creating of a book that mattered to me but what lights me up is the ongoing interaction, inspiration and indispensability of my heart community. In other words…..I missed YOU.

My self-loving is incomplete without YOU. That is the completing of the circle. We love each other until and as we are able to love ourselves and then the circle and cycle of Love is a complete circuit. Now we light the world. It is my intention to continue blogging regularly about Self-Love and how it matters in my daily life, extending love to my thoughts and my walk with the Holy Spirit here at Twelvemonth of Self Love because I realize blogging has become a part of my spiritual practice.

Self Love sings the the ENTIRE song of Love.

My larger intention will ultimately include:

1.  A group which will meet together live right here where I live beginning next January, a Twelvemonth of Self-Love Group dedicated to the unsung task of extending love to themselves.

2.  In addition to this I look forward to creating a blog or book of blogs which will gather under one digital roof, my brothers and sisters who delight in hearing and sharing their own Holy Heart (no matter what they call it) and their own Awareness of Love’s Presence. In this way we will surely support one another as we continue to discover and continue to remember who we really are.

Self Love is both a commitment to self and a commitment to my brother. Jesus said it best:

“Love thy neighbor as thy self.”

(And wouldn’t neighbor love be a lot more fun and way easier when we knew how to truly, intimately and easily love our own SELVES?)