In light of some recent intense events I found myself needing a word that I couldn’t find. A word that could describe what was happening and what I was feeling about what was happening. The word that arrived fully formed was:
FEELWORTHY (adj)–something (an event, person, experience) worthy of all the feelings I am having; having a right to have all the feelings present; all that I am feeling NOW ex: “This departure is feelworthy.”
In a matter of days just over a week ago several BIG things happens all close together. My nephew and his wife had a dear baby girl (the first of this generation in our family. My daughter got engaged to the man of all our dreams (on the top of Mt. Lassen no less). This wonderful young man that I will soon get to call son, left for his first active duty station and an era ended.
Ex: “This departure is feelworthy.”
We are a military family. My father was in the US Navy, my brother was a Marine, my husband in the Australian army. My nephews are in the Navy and Air Force. We know departures. From both sides, being the one departing
The departure was feelworthy.
and being the one left behind. It is always FEELWORTHY. I was feeling tumultuous emotions of joy, delight, sadness, grief, wonder, pain, spaciousness. I noticed that in keeping with my desire to express, notice and allow honesty I had to allow ALL I was feeling. Both the joy and the pain. Delight and grief. Wonder and feeling bereft. What was a surprise was in allowing all of my feelings as worthy to be felt, I actually felt myself expand rather than contract which is what happens when I only try to feel some of my feelings. It was a valid, treasured experience to allow the love that I was feeling express itself however it needed to without my censure of fear or holding back.
I was scheduled to meet with a friend right after the departure but had to cancel. I said I needed to be with all I was feeling. The feelworthiness of the moment was so very present I dared not miss it. Being honest leads to feelworthiness in all areas. Honesty helped me reach for a new word that could include all I was feeling, rather than split it into good or bad feelings.
What is feelworthy in you right now? What could you be with, this moment, you are trying to avoid? Take a few minutes and just sit still and feel whatever it is you are feeling. NOW is feelworthy. Honestly it is.
Begin using this word feelworthy, when you don’t know how to describe how you are feeling. You can describe an event, discovery, person, experience as feelworthy. This word will hold the space for all you are feeling without judgment. Try it and let me know how you go.
