As I continue my twelvemonth project and practice of extending love to my fears, I feel the calling/longing of my body and I am willing to be willing. Please give me an AHA and sign to get myself over the hump I feel I am in front of. These words came to me while coming back down the hall with my tea:
EVERY DAY
I sat down and put my tea on the table and noticed a book I ordered weeks ago yet have not read:
“Monk Habits for EVERYDAY People”—by Dennis Okholm
Wow! This is not going to be a 4am revelation is it? Am I increasing my willingness and listening such that we can talk (and I will hear) at 6am in the daylight?? Here it is. This is what I need to extend love to:
Fear of EVERY DAY
Oh! I am beginning to sense the sneakiness of the Holy Spirit. Last month I extended love by letting go of something each day. Now I will do/be something EVERY DAY. Yikes! I already heard the thought: “When do I get a day OFF?” Oh boy, the extending love begins. To the thought, “When do I get a day off?”
I extend empathy to this thought.
I remember something my husband said on the weekend when we was on poop patrol for our two corgis (a premonition perhaps?): “It is a lot easier to keep it nice when you do it DAILY.” Alright, I am ready to listen.
One mile EVERY DAY?
I need to pause here to explain why EVERY DAY strikes fear/resistance/annoyance/weariness in my heart. As long as I can remember our operating system as a family has been something akin to full on activity followed by collapse followed by full on activity followed by collapse. We work hard, play hard, do lots of things, love lots of people then exhaust ourselves and have to close the shutters, put the phones on silent and unplug everything to get a break from ourselves. This idea of anything every day is anathema. Of course I want to know when my day off is because that is only when I get to rest. If I am doing something (‘else’ is what I am thinking of course) every day then how can I ever rest?
As I ponder the words EVERY DAY other words pour onto my page:
EVERY DAY, EVER PRESENT, EVER AFTER, EVERY BODY, EVERY DAY, EVERY DAY, EVERY DAY
I’m already exhausted by the thought. It is the same feeling I had when I first heard about eternity, a n…..e…..v….e…r…….e…………….n………………d…………….i…………….n…………………..g ‘something’ I didn’t get.
Oh sure, I’ll brush my teeth every day and eat every day but I feel it in my bones that Holy Spirit is trying to pull a fast one on me this time. Ok, I give up. What is it I am to do/be every day?
HS: A mile EVERY DAY
Me: I immediately want to argue “Noooooo!!!” or boast “I can do MORE than a mile!”. Dang, this EVERY DAY makes me immediately want to change the goal line, negotiate and wiggle. This is going to be interesting.
What comes to mind when you hear the words, EVERY DAY? What is your heart calling you into every day?
I am with you. I look at everyday and think.. “but wait, where’s the down time”. Can one commit to having coffee every day? I’m fairly certain that’s not the idea. I’ll let you know what HS calls me to do this month every day.
For you committing to down time might be where the real juice is;) xoxo
Hello my friend and “other” HS voice. Yikes EVERYDAY!! The train of thought you express in today’s blog is like you are inside my head…how timely is this topic? I’m wrestling with the prospect of letting go of Wheat and gluten, everyday! So I shall look forward to your guidance and experience as you explore this topic. Much love and hugs to you xoxo
It is so funny how this EVERY DAY bring all our “NOOOOOOO’s!!!” to the surface. Just be kind to youerself every day, give yourself permission every day to BE. Notice how dear you are every day. The gluten thing will take care of itself. xoxox
It is so funny how this EVERY DAY bring all our “NOOOOOOO’s!!!” to the surface. Just be kind to yourself every day, give yourself permission every day to BE. Notice how dear you are every day. The gluten thing will take care of itself. xoxox
I’m a “to-do list” kind of girl. I always seem to have lists, notes, and piles of papers to “handle.” Yet, I became aware that I can do some of the top things, priorities or deadline things, and leave the rest for the next day, instead of feeling compelled to “do it all” and have a clean desk. HA! (That’ll be the day….)
So I’ve been finding that I can “make room” for MYSELF by parsing the to-do list in BALANCE with other things that nurture and rest my spirit.
I’m getting better and better at that.
Plus, we have someone interested in buying our house, as of the last day of the real estate agent’s contract with us. Double-HA! At the very last second, just when we felt sure we were not selling & moving, we find out that the last people to look at our house is contacting their mortgage company to see if they can get the mortgage to buy our house. Soooo, we (hubby & I) are endeavoring to STAY PRESENT, not knowing …. Every day, one at a time, doing what is on our plate for this day only… gulp!!! ~SMILE~ Basking in the gratitude and blessings of THIS DAY!
Oh goodie! I’m thrilled to hear the news re a possible buyer. EVERY DAY will happen in delight and peace no matter what happens with the house. I am with you in the waiting and the not-known! xoxo
E,
I had the same panicked thought – “EVERY DAY? Well, good luck with that” and then I thought. Oh Crap.
I never did start meditating because EVERY DAY is hard. Perhaps a paradigm shift is in order. Much like someone who has an addiction needs to have conscious thought about each minute/hour/day to stop doing something, I need to make a conscious thought to DO something. Even now I think when am I going to do that. Work 8-5, school at night and on most of the weekend, choir practice on Wednesday, church on Sunday, advocacy work, ahhhhhhh. It’s exhausting.
Just stop it, stoopid brain. I can do five minutes of meditating in the morning. It might even make my life better. Huh.
Thanks for sharing!!!!
xo
I am guessing the EVERY DAY thing really is about bring all our thoughts to the surface of our awareness to be loved:) Go ahead and give yourself five minutes Stacey, ask to awaken five minutes early and lay in bed and purposely meditate on how precious you are asking for kindness and grace to light your way in all you do in the day. Love you! xoxo