I think the hardest thing to let go is what I think about something. Especially when that “something” is, in fact, nothing. I am beginning to see I am not letting go of something, I am simply allowing myself to live with hands (and eyes and heart) wide open. I am not letting go of something I have a hold of, I am just letting go of thinking I have a hold of something. This morning a book sitting on my book shelf caught my eye. This is significant because I look at the book shelf every day and today one book literally called to me. It must be just what I need right now. I have only the vaguest recollection of buying this book and have definitely not read it yet. According to the publish date it has been sitting on my bookshelf waiting for me since 2008. Maybe just what I read in the introduction is all I need but it is so delicious I must share because it has quite a bit to do with letting go into rather letting go of.
I immediately resonated with this “field of intelligent energy” as the vastness of Love. This vastness has been calling to me within my heart. I remember as a child nearly putting my hands over my ears when hearing about “eternity” or “infinity” because it literally made my brain hurt to think about it. Now I know why. You can’t think about it you simply have to feel it in your being. This poem I wrote a few days before finding this quote says it another way:
“What Friends Are For”
Welcome Home
The Vastness is my friend
ready to hold all of me
in any moment
tears, worries, doubts,
anger, tiredness, nausea
regret, shame, chagrin
all I need for the relief of peace
is to sink into my friend’s arms
and wait for the truth to dawn once more
That’s what this letting go practice is about! Letting go into the Vastness, without being afraid. I am already IN this beautiful, kind Vastness but am afraid to know this. Now I am beginning to abide in letting go I can allow the immensity of Love to be my friend, inside and out.
**Today I let go into mealtimes are optional. (meals certainly, when?…….now there is the juice)
Eva – you brought to mind my grandmother this morning with your meal times. Gone into Heaven since 2003, but I can still remember asking her “Are you hungry” to which she would reply “What time is it”. She was so set on “mealtime” that if it wasn’t time for dinner or supper she’s “not hungry”. Thank you for bringing a memory of her back.
That is so funny! My grandmother was a rigid meal timer too, I can remember finding her teary because she ate breakfast at 9 (instead of the usual 8:00) and when I asked her why she was crying she said, “Eva, I just know it is going to mess up my WHOLE day!” I never really thought about it but THAT is probably where I got this idea that the TIME we eat is equally important to what/how we eat. Thank YOU Deb! xo
vastness, eternity, infinity, field of intelligent energy, unconditional love, God…
aaaahhhhhhh….
I know, right?! Love that we get to feast together:) xo