4. Day 2: Room Assignments, Longmire & Shoes

I can’t seem to feel the letting-go energy without adding a final “d”–to feel letting God.  I know I have been afraid to let go but right now as I feel into the the letting-go(d) I am relieved, delighted and exhilarated.  Up until recently I know that I had to hang on tight:  to what I know to be true, for safety and for certainty (a bird in hand).  I just walked out in full forward motion to the back porch with tea and journal in hand and my tow caught the edge of the footrest and I nearly want a** over teacup.  The blockage stopped and redirected this powerful energy (which had to go somewhere into a discombobulated me.) Today is my Crocker touring day and I feel the usual nervous excited resistance (I love touring yet hate hurrying and leaving the house when I could be doing so many other things) and I am also feeling the letting-go energy and am more aware of the possibility it might be helpful.

Letting go of shoes is hard to do.

Yesterday I let go of:  room assignments for visitors, worrying about it, wanting to leave Crocker early (and worry and assign rooms), watching a favorite new episode of Longmire (accidentally deleted it but I LET GO being upset about it), the pair of shoes I bought at Target that make me feel wobbly.

I am noticing my auto pilot is “HANG ON!!”, the shout you make to your passengers when careening around a hairpin curve while being chased by SS troops or when a letter form the IRS arrives.  that “HANG ON!!”, I am noticing is nearly ever present.  No wonder I need to practice letting go.  Letting go means saying goodbye to the illusion of safety I cling to even at the expense of that deeper, broader sense of all-is-well that I now know is there.  I realized yesterday that hanging on/letting go were part of the same cycle flow of energy, that both are needed to allow the movement of life.

I extend tenderness to letting go.

HS:  Letting go is not throwing away.  Letting go is allowing the natural movement inherent in objects, circumstances and creations.  Letting go is opening to what already is, movement is. When you feel dizzy or fraught when you feel an abrupt, sharp or speeded up movement just notice these qualities of movement.

Movement is life.

There is flow and movement even in stillness, a pulse of living that remains ready, vast and kind.  Fear not the movement in herent in all things.  As you allow this so you allow your own perfect process and dance.

Letting go is giving yourself over to your Self; acceptance, welcome and surrender implied. Always know, I’ve got your back (and your front, side, inside and out).  We are One.  Amen & Selah.