I am beginning to realize that all these fears in the “21 Fear Salute” of depression are all kind of the same. The fear of truth. We are so afraid that Love is not the truth about us that even though we long for, hope, cross our fingers we still do not feel sure. The next fear which is the fear of being exposed uncovers a broader truth. We actually are afraid LOVE is the truth about us.
This is deep yet universal. It is what we think vulnerability will feel like; exposed, naked, without excuse. When I feel exposed I feel very uncomfortable with no where to go, do or be. It is just hanging out for all to see. Kind of like this blog. What or who is hanging out for all to see? Is it the real me? Who is that exactly?
This is the big fear. Both that I am certain the real me will be found wanting or that I don’t have a clue who the real me is. Either path leads to embarrassment and me wishing I had a paper bag to put over my head.
Vulnerability & Truth
But what if for just a moment I let the exposure that vulnerability feels like just be?
I guess I could do that. I could even go so far as extend love to feeling exposed.
I extend understanding to this thought.
I am feeling exposed by writing this blog. But something else is happening. The very vulnerability I am opening myself up to is the truth. I am exposing the truth about myself in that I am love. I may be expressed as a particular flavor of love but I am love. Thankfully love has infinite qualities for me to explore and express. The covering over I have done to NOT see the love that I am is pretty prolific (fear, panic, boredom, annoyance, anger, hatred, doubt, guilt, shock, death).
What if I stood in the power of my vulnerability instead of being fearful of exposure?
